GORGED OF THE JUNGLE

Well, we came and we gorged. There was waaayy too much food, which is the waaayy we like it, and there were no disasters. Which is boring.

We started with an entree of Broccoli Tree Dip which is a bowl of dip you stick little florets of broccoli and asparagus and crunchy dipping sticks in and it looks like a jungle scene. And I just remembered there's a container of leftover dip in the back of the fridge. It may have grown a real jungle by now.


Broccoli Tree Dip
(makes 3 cups)

250g spreadable light cream cheese
250g smooth low-fat ricotta cheese
1/3 cup corn relish
2 Tbsp sweet chilli sauce
1 Lebanese cucumber, grated
Steamed broccoli florets, asparagus, carrot, celery and dipping stix

Whisk cream cheese and ricotta in a bowl till smooth. Stir in corn relish, sweet chilli sauce and cucumber. Stick vegetables in and serve.


We also had Jungle Juice, which, admittedly, sounds like either an aphrodisiac or poison, but I promise there was no funny business going on.


Jungle Juice
(Serves 6)

750mL soda water
2 cups orange juice
Generous splash of Midori
A can of pineapple pieces

Mix together. Hang Barrel of Monkey monkeys on glasses.


For main was coconut milk based Jungle Fish Curry from Taste.com.au. You can get the curry paste at Safeway and it's actually called 'Jungle Curry Paste'. The jar said a true jungle curry doesn't contain coconut milk, because there aren't usually coconuts in the Thai jungle, but none of my guests were the wiser. Except the ones I told. Which was everyone.

I used bassa fillets, added a bag of cooked prawns and used about half the specified amount of curry paste, as we just wanted a bit of zing, not to set the jungle on fire.

Dessert was completely OTT. We started with a 'palate cleanser' of Swamp Jellies, which were espresso glasses filled with layers of different coloured jelly with little gummy lions and snakes and hippos trapped in a state of suspended animation inside.

Next, Barbecued Banana Splits, which I happened to see a few days before on Fresh TV. You split the bananas with the skin on, chuck a broken up Snickers bar inside, close it up, wrap it in foil and throw it on the barbie for 5 minutes. I don't know if they're any good because I had to put Gastro Boy to bed after I served them, and when I came back mine was more like Cold Barbecued Banana Split and Icecream Soup. You can find the recipe here, although it will probably be an expanded version of what I just said.

Last, but not least, the crowning glory, a lion cake. I was exceedingly proud, but apparently not proud enough to think of taking a photo of it. Everyone was too stuffed to eat it so it just sat there looking marvelous (in my humble opinion).

I had told everyone to get into the theme and dress up, and I was planning to wear a big piece of leopard-print material, toga-like, a la Jane. But between the jelly swamping and the jungle currying, I couldn't find it, so we had one birthday boy rock up with a tail, the other with a wrist cuff, a hot girl come in a leopard-print skirt, and me, the host, in my normal clothes and feeling very disappointed in myself.

Then the other day I was cleaning out a cupboard and I found the blasted piece of material, except it was much, MUCH smaller than I had imagined... which made me think it was a good thing for all it wasn't found. Or a bad thing, if you're into the bib-and-only-a-bib look.

I swear there was no funny business..